I LOVE Silas!

I did not want to wait. I wanted to get to Asia asap so that we could get settled, have normalcy, start learning the language, finally get to the place we have been longing to go... but God wanted us to wait. Sure God may have many different purposes for our delay, but one in my attitude toward Silas. It is hard for me to confess this, but I have had trouble really loving and appreciating my son. Sure, I love him to death because he is my son and he makes me smile, but whenever anyone said "isn't being a mother great!" (or something to that effect) all I could really do was shrug or say "I love Silas". I found that in the busyness of our life, of packing, moving, reading, writing papers, going to class, applying for visas, traveling, trying to say goodbye and make new relationships... I viewed Silas as more of a burden or responsibility than as a blessing and a joy. For two months I was separated from Silas from 9-3 while I was in class, and until he went to bed 8 it seems that I always had something that needed to get done that would have been so much easier without Silas. Don't get me wrong, I loved him and I was thankful for him, but I looked forward to easier times and thought about all the things I was missing.

Had we gone straight to Asia, it would have been the same thing there. I would be in language school and Silas would be with a sitter and I would be so busy doing other things that I would miss out on just enjoying my son.

But God had other plans- for the past month, other than packing, Silas has pretty much been my only responsibility. There have been no deadlines, no classes to attend, no dinner to cook, very little cleaning...and I have been able to play with Silas. I have observed him, learned what he really likes, how to make him laugh... He is such a blessing!

I know that I am biased, but I think I have the most precious baby in the world. Silas has a smile that lights up the room and could turn any frown upside down. If Silas smiled any wider it would not fit on his little round face. I love going into his room in the morning or after a nap and seeing his huge smile and big blue eyes looking up at me. It is amazing to see how his face lights up when I walk in the room (especially when he is hungry) and hear him coo and sing. Silas is so energetic, so happy, so expressive, I enjoy and cherish him so much. he is a treasure and I thank God for him.

Moving on Up!

I was planning to wait until we got to South Asia to start Silas on solid food, but he showed all of the signs of wanting to start, so we gave rice cereal a try a few days before his 5 month birthday. I was amazed how easily he took it. He charged after the spoon and kept wanting more and more. The first time was a little messy because the cereal was really runny, but after that he has been a pretty neat eater. Of course he is also easily distracted when other people are around.

We have started a regular evening routine where Silas eats his rice cereal, Mommy and Daddy eat, and then we all go for a walk around the neighborhood. It is a lot of fun and a good way to wind down after a long and exciting day. When we get home it is bath time, milk time, then bed time. Silas is great at going to bed at night. We just swaddle him and put him in the crip and he doesn't make another peep.

Silas likes to Swing

Since we are still going to be at my parents' house for a while, my mom went out a bought a tree swing for Silas. He loves being outside (as I think most babies do) and really enjoys swinging. I cant' believe how big Silas is getting. He is so expressive, active, and loud. He certainly likes to use his voice and I look forward to when he can form words. Silas is a very social baby and loves to talk with me while he is nursing. It can be quite funny, but also a little frustrating if we are in a hurry. He is such a blessing and a joy though.

Silas Before Haircut (sorry out of order)

 

Posing with Mommy

He went to the playground for the first time- slid down the slide with Daddy and rode in the swing.

After his four month shot Silas started making a funny face of discomfort.

Playing with Gramps

  Silas loves reading books with Daddy!!

Learning in Limbo

Well, we were "supposed" to leave for South Asia on April 6^th, but we are still in America and still without our visas. This is certainly a testing in patience. I am beginning to see a pattern in my life. I had to wait for Silas, and now for visas, and in both cases you just have to be ready whenever the day comes. I feel very blessed to have wonderful parents who let us stay with them and give us date nights (much appreciated) but it is difficult to be in this time of limbo where we don't really know what our purpose is. I just have to hold to the knowledge that God's timing is perfect and he has a reason for our delay.

One difficult thing about our delay is that the longer we are here, the more nervous about leaving I become. It is amazing how perspective changes after having a child. I think back to my time in Asia as a single and look at the uncertainty, long bus rides, mountain hikes, staying with strangers, traveling from place to place… as a great adventure, but now that I have the responsibility of caring for a 5 month old, it is stress. Fortunately, the God who took care of me and amazed me in my previous adventures, is the same God who will be with me and will provide for Silas's needs on our new adventure. I am so thankful that I am in the hands of a faithful God who has the power to keep his promises!

1st Real Haircut

Since Silas's hair was sticking 3 inches straight up, we decided to get it cut before we leave the states. So here is the beginning of the haircut. He did such a good job!! He sat up like a big boy and didn't make a peep. The result of the haircut is little short for my liking and it still sticks up, but that is his personality!